Debunking the Wells Report Using One Figure

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The picture above shows, as proven by Exponent (the “scientific” company who performed all of the deflation experiments), the difference between the two gauges used to measure the footballs before the game, during halftime and after the game.

“Exponent‟s experimental results were aligned with the measurements recorded at halftime, which indicated a consistent gauge-to-gauge differential of 0.3-0.45 psi”

So if the Logo Gauge measured the Patriots balls at around 12.5 PSI before the game, they would have all been under the League mandated and apparently holy range which is 12.5-13.5 PSI. Given that all the Colts balls measured at halftime are under their starting point of 13 PSI, its safe to say that the Patriots balls could have also dropped below 12.5 even when measured with the Logo gauge.

You might be wondering, “I wonder if the ref who measured the balls remembers which gauge he used?” Here’s what that ref had to say, “Although Anderson‟s best recollection is that he used the Logo Gauge, he said that it is certainly possible that he used the Non-Logo Gauge”

So let me get this straight. Ted Wells said, “We credit Anderson‟s recollection of the pre-game measurements taken on the day of the AFC Championship Game based on both the level of confidence Anderson expressed in his recollection and the consistency of his recollection with information provided by each of the Patriots and Colts regarding their target inflation levels.” But he doesn’t believe he remembered which gauge he used. Seems like a giant load of horseshit to me but lets go ahead and suspend Brady on hearsay.

Lastly, I’d like to point out that if you’re going to have rules which demand a pressure range of 1 PSI you should probably have better measuring equipment that two gauges that vary by FUCKING FORTY FIVE PERCENT OF YOUR RANGE YOU FUCKING FUCKS.

If Tom Brady is suspended over this Roger Goodell will not have a job come 2016. I can’t even believe I wrote a fucking blog about this. Colts balls measured under 12.5 PSI with at least one measurement. One of the Patriots balls measured ABOVE 13.5 at post-game. This is such bullshit I can’t stand it.

Not one QB, save for Colin Kaepernick (who’s on Team TB12), has come forward condemning Brady or anything regarding the Well’s report. Why? Because every QB doctors their balls how they want. Why do you think all the Colt’s balls were at 13 PSI? Was it so they could stay in the range of the NFL? No. It’s because that’s how Andrew Luck likes his balls. The thought of this archaic rule keeping the best QB in football’s history from playing for any amount of time is vomit-inducing.

A lot of idiots are chirping about the integrity of the game being tarnished etc etc. The integrity of the game is preserved by everyone trying to do their best to win at all costs. Atlanta piping in crowd noise, Minnesota heating their balls even though it is explicitly against league rules (as outlined by the Well’s report), Jerry Rice using Stickum, or even the Dolphins new stadium being totally shaded except for the opposing team’s sideline. Every team blurs the line of cheating or getting a competitive edge. The only person who directly benefited from true cheating is John Elway and his two Super Bowl winning teams which broke the salary cap and actually won things by cheating.

But yeah lets talk about how somewhere between 1 and 2 PSI is going to cost the greatest QB in NFL history his legacy.

If you don’t think the Patriots are in the Super Bowl again next year, you’re out of your gourd.


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