Heartwarming Story: 800lb Snowball Crashes into Dorm




Two math majors made a giant snowball. Rolled it down the sidewalk to make it even bigger. It got away from them slams into a dorm. Breaks the wall a little bit. Does like 2,000-3,000 dollars worth of damage. Why is this a heartwarming story you might ask? What possible good could have come from having a behemoth of a snowball smash into a dorm? 

The students responsible for the runaway snowball reported the incident and won’t be disciplined, Myers said, because they didn’t intend to cause damage and feel awful about what happened.

Because you just don’t see people use common sense anymore. This is a rare glimmer of a college using its brain for .2 seconds and thinking, “Gee, maybe the financial blow of 2k-3k is far less for the college than these two students. Since they didn’t mean to do it maybe we’ll just call this kids will be kids.” 

We are so fucking stifled in this country its out of control. You know why college kids binge drink and do drugs on weekends. Aside from it being awesome and leading to more than a few good stories, its because if you do fucking anything and it goes sour you get fucked. School site kids for having snowball fights. Not the malicious kind either just the fun kind. Any other school and these kids would be looking at a bare minimum of paying for the damages and possible probations or something. The only time you don’t get in trouble is when you do nothing that can hurt anyone else. You know what doesn’t hurt anyone else? Me ripping shots till everything is fun, even lying facedown in the bathroom. 

In high school me and a bunch of kids were hanging out in a middle school parking lot. We weren’t doing anything illegal. We were literally just standing around talking. Cop roars in out of nowhere spotlight shining. Gets out of his car and just starts grilling us. “What are you doing here? This is private property. You can’t be here. Are you drinking?” Just fucking badgering us. So you know what we did? We walked to my good friends house right around the corner and got shit faced because fuck you that’s why. 

So good for Reed College for being reasonable people! Keep on keep on’ing!

(Trademark pending on the phrase Keep on keep on’ing)


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