The Internet Made Me Blog About Jacoby Ellsbury

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As everyone and their mother now knows, Jacoby Ellsbury agreed to a 7-year $153 million dollar deal with the Yankees. Yawn. I really didn’t want to talk about this. But people were coming out of the woodwork on Facebook to lament about the Great Traitor Jacoby Ellsbury. People who I didn’t even know were Red Sox fans. I’m confident there were six year olds who were incensed by this move. “I feel a disturbance in the force” “YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO BE THE CHOSEN ONE! YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO RESTORE BALANCE!!” It’s just fucking out of control. He’s getting a wrap worse than Judas for this shit. He is 30 years old and has played 6 seasons for the Red Sox in the Majors. 4 full seasons and 2 he was injured for. The Red Sox were willing to give him 20 million a year. He went for the $25 million a year. Can you blame him? He grew up in Oregon. People act like he owes us shit cause he played for Pawtucket. I say good luck Jacoby. 

Beyond this nonsense, he’s not fucking worth that kind of money for the Red Sox. Maybe he is to the Yankees because they just throw money away like rotten milk. Given his injuries and rehab time, I think out of years 4,5,6,7 he might play one full season. But hey, prove me wrong. 

Lastly, a lot of Yankee fans are talking about how great they are, “Ooo greatest franchise in history” all that shit. I’m sick of Yankee fans hanging their hats on the laurels of bygone years. You WERE a great franchise. You fucking crushed it in the 40s and 50s when their was no free agency and you could just hold on to legends until they retired. Let’s talk about my lifetime. Since 1991, the Yankees have won 5 World Series. The Red Sox have won 3. Only time will tell but it seems like hurling money at big name players might not be the best way to win Championships. I don’t know I’m just spit balling. 

In conclusion, WORST TO FIRST BABY!! WOOO! WORLD SERIES CHAMPS EAT A FAT ONE YANKEES.

 

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