Vaccines DO NOT cause autism. Period.

Vaccines DO NOT cause autism. Period.

I feel like this is a topic that is given far too much credence by basically everyone. This is not a debate. This is not even as “controversial” as global. This is pretty much black and white. Vaccines DO NOT CAUSE AUTISM. They fucking don’t. If you believe this we simply cannot be friends. Take your head out of your asshole. I know you’re thinking “But Captain Salami, how can you be so sure? How can you possibly know the Evil Empire (FDA and America) haven’t let this slip through their testing. One crack doctor is exposing it and they’re keeping him down!”

I’ll tell you how. Cause I’m not a moron and did some basic research. Lets do some fact checking just so were on the same page:

1. The MMR vaccine is administered in the first 15 months of life.

2. For the sake of this thought experiment, literally every baby born gets the MMR vaccine. The number of babies not vaccinated is not high enough to be statistically relevant. 

3. There are 2 MMR vaccines given and both were licensed by 1989. 

Given these parameters IF the MMR vaccine causes autism or mental illness and the increasing rate of autism in America is a direct result of this THEN the rate of autism increase in America should be correlated with the birthrate. Every baby is vaccinated then every baby has a chance to get autism from the vaccine so the more babies vaccinated the more autism. However if you look at the incidence of autism in America vs the birthrate this is not the case. Therefore the MMR vaccine does not cause Autism. Now stop ruining it for the rest of us and get your kids vaccinated before they get measles and die.  

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