Beer Review: Sam Adams Hazel Brown Ale

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I’ve been busy and my beer drinking has suffered. But fear not, after this weekend I should have much more free time = drink a lot more beer. 

Sam Adams Brown Ale was surprisingly good for a number of reasons. 1. I don’t like Brown Ales. I think they have a stronger bitterness and or general funk. 2. I’m skeptical of a specialty brown ale mainly because I don’t like brown ales. 

This brown ale is actually fantastic. Very smooth. Nice medium body. Good mouth feel. No funk. You can taste whatever they did to make it hazelnutty. Probably one of the better non-pumpkin fall beers I’ve had so far. Definitely worth a shot, even if you’re not the biggest fan of brown ales. 

Salami Rating: 8

Eating Fruit is better than Drinking Processed Fruit Juice? Shocker.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-23880701Image

Absolutely shocking. I had no idea that eating fruit, rather than its sugar filled, less nutritious counterpart could lower type-2 diabetes. “Drinking fruit juice, people have a slightly higher risk of type-2 diabetes.” Wow. You ever think that maybe its all the fucking SUGAR?!

I don’t know. I’m just spit balling, but sugar consumption is what causes type-2 diabetes, right? So eating probably anything other than sugar and trash will decrease your chances of type-2 diabetes. Some people are just fucking thick, huh? I bet there are a bunch of assholes out there just thinking, “Well this is fruit juice, which is, like, the same thing as fruit right? Cause I don’t like fruit. It’s not sweet enough.” Stop sucking down the juice bozos or I’m gonna take your fucking foot whether you need it cut off or not. Dicks.

Someone get me the Moon with frickin’ lasers attached to it

Someone get me the Moon with frickin’ lasers attached to it

“Humans will be able to control robots, millions of miles away, for missions like asteroid mining.” You had me at robots. How much do you think high tech, robotic, space miner pays? Millions? Best part is I don’t have to worry about space lung or chest explosionitis or whatever the fuck you get from mining asteroids in space. 

Also I think this has the capacity to be the best pickup line of all time. “Hi. You don’t know me but I’m a high tech, robotic, space miner.” “Seriously?” “Seriously”. Show some HD footage your robots beamed you and you’re in.

NASA has really stepped it up. You seen the names of our rockets now? Minotaur V! So masculine. No more of this Apollo or Gemini bullshit. Motherfucking Minotaur V coming right at your face. Yes the V is important. Probably the best part about the name. Who knows what’s next from NASA? If I had to guess the next rocket will be “Salami X”. Its next level masculine. 

Richie Incognito: Dirtiest player in NFL coming clean

http://www.nfl.com/incognito

Great article. Well written. Interesting insight into Incognito and what was going on with him. Living in New England and watching a lot football and NFL network I had heard that he was a dirty player. I always wondered what that even meant. Especially since he is an O-lineman. Apparently it means he may or may not have punched people in the junk. 100% on Team Incognito just for that.

Can you imagine how funny that would be to see? Angry, angry men like Terrel Suggs coming in rushing and Richie stand him up and gives him a good one right in his nugZ. I think it would look like this: Image

Someone teach me how to .gif

Someone teach me how to .gif

I took a video of Brady being weird and funny yesterday. I sent it out to Barstool and told them to turn it into a gif and they did. And now its on their website. And now I wish I’d giffed it myself so I could reap all of the internet fame and riches that come with creating a viral gif. Shame really. Oh well. Anyway the gif is hilarious as I anticipated and wordpress doesn’t let me upload videos as far as I can tell so follow the link to see it. 

Fast-food workers strike for minimum wage increase

Fast-food workers strike for minimum wage increase

There is no part about this I don’t like. Fast food production is getting slowed down and the workers are fighting for higher minimum wage. The fact that a full time worker can get paid as low as $7.25 an hour is ridiculous. In this day and age?

The counter argument is that these jobs will become automated if the workers keep striking. I call bullshit. McDonalds is 100% tryings its hardest to make the most money it can. If they could have automated everything and gotten rid of people they have to pay they would have. 

Viva la revolution! Viva the Strike! Down with Fast Food! Wait. The workers want to get $15 an hour? That’s wayyyyy to close to what I’m making and I graduated college. This is ridiculous! Get back to work you sons a bitches! 

It Begins…..

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The feds have finally come to their senses. They aren’t going to interfere when states legalize marijuana use medical or otherwise. They will however go after drug trafficking/cartels and people selling to minors. 

They’re just laying the foundation! I might not even reach retirement age before marijuana is simply a regulated item like cigarettes or booze. Except it doesn’t kill you like cigarettes or booze. 

Here’s the timeline: First the feds set this up. Let states test shit out in a zero risk venture. If things go bad in the states with legalized pot, Congress says, “We told you so idiots.” If things go good and states start making money, Congress says, “Give us a portion of your money….idiots.” Its brilliant really. Plus medical marijuana dispensaries provide a model for people when they want to open their own shops when (not if) it becomes legal. A new age is upon us ladies and gentlemen. The Green Age.